Life is hard right now, I am not going to sugarcoat it anymore. When people ask how I am, I tell them I am hanging in there. Hanging in there is all I can do. This position we are in right now, I don’t wish on anybody, but we are in it and we have to live in it.

We are trying everything that we can think of, or find to get a job. Over qualified, under qualified, not enough experience, and that is what you get when they do respond to your application. The frustration level is high, you go out and drive around to be told to ‘apply online’, so you do and weeks pass by, no reaction. The reactions you do get are 4 months later (4months!!!).

Since when did we become this ‘everything is online’ society? Where are the businesses that you can walk into that let you talk to the main person, to get yourself a job. It doesn’t matter what job it is, you want to provide for your family and you simply can’t. How can you get out of this big dark hole? Nothing is working and months are passing by.

There is nothing worse than feeling hopeless, and that’s where I am at right now. I think. I honestly do not know how to describe how I feel. On the outside I am smiling and keeping my ‘game face’ on, but on the inside? I have no clue. Every emotion possible I think. I have to keep it together for the kids, they don’t need to be living with this burden. IF it weren’t for living with my family, we would be on the street. I will be forever thankful for them, but am ready to have my own place and life again. As are they.

I don’t care where a new job/adventure would take us.  I am just hoping, also for the husband, to find something now. Sometimes there is hope, and then BAM you get knocked down by a freight truck. It’s putting a strain on everything. Having all your things in storage, not having your ‘own’ place. The kids not having their own room. The two youngest don’t mind for now, but the oldest keeps asking when she can have her own room again. That messes with your head… She is not suffering but still.

Of course there are worse things that could happen, absolutely. So I am not trying to give a pity story. But for us life right now is a challenge to say the least. We have to stay positive, and keep moving forward. That’s all we can do.

That’s it for today, inspiration has not been here lately, so blogging has been hard but know I am doing the best I can, you can always follow us on Instagram (@dutchmomamericandad), twitter (@DutchMAmericanD), Facebook and Pinterest!

Peace and Chicken Nuggets!


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